a long month.

I'm pretty sure i haven't blogged in a month. =/ sorry bout that..

some new things have been happening...good and bad..

he's gone..
yet still in my heart...
deep sin...
wanting to get uprooted..
i preached...
and there is no way that it isn't going to happen again...
going to dinner with ryan yamin tomarrow...
o.O....
a new coach...
and maybe someone will ask me to be there's...?
probably not...but that's been my life...
struggle...victory...and struggle again...ohh the seasons of life...:]

I PREACHED!

soo i preached at my youth group!! i was planning it for like a month and knew it was gonna happen for 3 so this has been a long time in the making but please go listen! hope ya'll like it!

http://tinyurl.com/2whu5mm

LOVE YA!
~Jess~

just stuff.

it's been a long day.

and it's not even over yet!

I have allergies. Thus, i have a sore thoat.

My friends are going through hard times.

Broken promises are the new normal.

it is 98 degrees outside and very humid with no clouds.

i will be doing school until august 17.

My youth pastor's dad had a heartattack and thus there will not be gen church tomarrow. great.

BUT. i am going swimming tomarrow. :)

love.

I'm not totally sure about him...

All i know is that i accept him.

For the parts i love about him...and the parts that bug the crap out of me.

All of him. even if i get mad at him...something stonger overpowers that...and the anger washes away...

He has changed me permanently.

Whether i end up with him or not...

I'll never forget him.

and maybe...just maybe....i love him. :)

can i do it?

I'm not sure if i can.

But i'll never know if i don't try.

I'm not about to back down now. 

Fear does not control me. 

I will move foward. 

I will suceed.

Because i already have the victory. 

Fitting In.

"If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but i have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you." -John 15:19

Why is this so hard for me to grasp?

I am of God and lives as God wants me to (to the best of my ability) yet i expect to fit in with my friends...?

I am officially stupid. 

I need to stop being so frustrated when my friends don't like me because i choose not gossip, date, or do other wordly things that i know i am not called to do. 

News Flash: they won't like me. At least not all the time. I need to stop thinking that God won't open other doors for me (cause we all know that He knows that we need relahsonships). He will. He will provide for all of my needs and won't miss a thing because He is perfect and does NOT forget His children. 

Stand.

I'm in a battle. And though we are always in a spiritual battle i'm in the climax of it.

Will i win? or fall back?

I've been falling back and wondering why.

Maybe because i'm trying to charge into battle without a sword or amour.

How stupid! I'm done lying on my back, believing the devil's lies and just waiting to be killed.

I will stand. I will fight. I will win.

I will have the victory because i have the ultimate Overcomer living inside of me.